We are all here at cre8buzz for various reasons, but two of the top would have to be to 1) build and participate in a fun and relevant community and 2) to drive new, quality traffic to our personal blogs. As one of the first 100 beta testers of cre8buzz, I have seen an increase in traffic and comments at my personal blog, Velveteen Mind, since day one. I've met some fantastic bloggers and picked up some interesting (and interested) subscribers. Needless to say, I've also had a lot of fun along the way.

However, in discussing traffic sources with other cre8buzz bloggers recently, I realized that not everyone is seeing a steady flow of traffic back to their own blogs from their cre8buzz profiles. Taking a moment to step back and look at the forest rather than the trees revealed that one main difference between the profiles that drive readers to our blogs and those that don't (yet) appears to be widgets.

I was one of the first to add widgets to my cre8buzz profile, specifically the RSS feed widget (this was back in the day of no custom templates), and I still field a lot of questions about them. Ya'll, I promise they are super easy to install and fun to play with, so here is a quick breakdown of the widgets I use and how easy it is for you to install them, too.

SpringWidgets RSS feed widget:

http://www.springwidgets.com/widgetize/23/?param=http%3A%2F%2Ffeeds.feedburner.com%2FVelveteenMind&paramstyleborderColor=0x330099&paramstylebrandUrl=http://downloads.thespringbox.com/hostedcontent/images/3c380a44d01149f7a117a02ccf6af121.jpg&width=300&height=418&wiid=wiid23&partner_id=0

This is the one that features the feed for your personal blog, highlighting your post titles and a brief snippet of each post. It is safe to say that the majority of my traffic comes from this one. Although cre8buzz does have a section for you to highlight your favorite posts (or all of your posts), this widget cuts out one more click from the process of giving your profile viewers a taste of what your blog is like. If they see a snazzy title that they like, they click and it takes them straight to you.

The link above takes you directly to my SpringWidget feed, though not with my specific customizations. You could also go to the root of the set-up (below), though, and start from the beginning without my example. If you aren't familiar with pixel widths of your cre8buzz profile columns, this set-up page gives you easy to guesstimate guides to go by. You can tweak and tweak to your heart's content. Just set your size, feed URL, color choice, and picture if you want to use one.

http://www.springwidgets.com/express/getFeed/

Twitter badge: Flash, with Friends:

http://twitter.com/badges/which_badge

This is the one with the little pictures and updates about what certain bloggers are doing. Totally obnoxious and completely addictive. I chose the "Flash, with Friends" badge, but you can choose one that features just your Twitter updates. I like the "with friends" one because it is similar to the Google Share feature where you can highlight what your favorite bloggers are doing, in addition to just your own brilliance. When a reader sees something funny or interesting, they click your Twitter (sounds dirty, right?), it takes them to your Twitter page, and then they can click through to your blog. Sure, it takes a couple of clicks, but it pulls people in with a glimpse of your personality.

The link above takes you directly the the html badge choices, which is what you'll need for cre8buzz.

Finally, the Chat Widget:

http://beta.cre8buzz.com/profiles/89/blogs/608/blog_entries/4121

This is a chat widget that I bought for cre8buzz in order to temporarily fill a repeated request to Antman for a site-wide chat widget. At the time, there were no other chat choices, so I tested a handful of them on my profile and ultimately chose this one because it was the least intrusive and allowed you to link back to your personal blog through your screenname. Again, one more chance to get your profile viewers to click through to your blog. Even if you aren't on live, chatting at that moment, they can scroll back through old conversations and pick up on bloggers they think are funny or clever. It also has a timestamp so you can see when the last message was posted, that way you aren't always responding to chats from hours before.

The link above takes you to my cre8buzz blog post that has the chat widget code.

The key with each of these widgets is that they highlight you and your personality. Most importantly, they do so along with links back to your blog. Increase the links, increase the odds that your traffic will pick up and you will gain some fabulous new readers. Even better, you'll find fantastic new blogs to read yourself. And that's why we are all here, isn't it? So get buzzing! Oh, yeah, and installing widgets.

An easy way to install them, if you don't know what to do is:
Go to My Stuff.
Click on Create/Edit Custom Theme under Manage My Profile.
Paste the codes under the right sidebar, where you see <cre8Buzz-contact-me /> but above </div>.
I put paragraph breaks between each code and centered them, as well. Just place the code between <p><center>insert code here</center></p> for each one.

Let me know if you have any questions! I'm no tech wiz, so if I can do it, you definitely can!

My husband considers himself lucky because I am not into spending money on clothing, makeup, shoes, or other material possessions. Particularly after Katrina, I am in no hurry to put our money into anything that can go poof and simply disappear.

Rather, I research interest rates of money market accounts online, study the bios of companies whose stock I'm interested in buying, and listen to Clark Howard on talk radio with an avid interest I used to reserve for BOP articles about Corey Haim. As much as I might like, deep down, to spend a huge chunk of cash on a new wardrobe from Saks Fifth Avenue, I just can't get all fired up about it. I can get all fired up about earning a 10% return on the cash that would buy that wardrobe, though.

This is an easy, responsible financial approach to take for me because, well, I don't really have any money. Therefore, I don't really have any temptations. Not right now, anyway.

Due to a combination of factors that came simultaneously crashing down on our heads after the storm, we find ourselves in the position of living, more or less, month to month. This is remarkable, given that we still don't have a home again, yet. Fortunately, due to a combination of factors that have simultaneously lifted burdens from our shoulders, we are currently sitting on the precipice of hopefully never living month to month again. It has taken two years, but we are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

And it has been a long tunnel.

For superstition's sake, let me now say, "Knock on wood," for this entire post.

People comment to me all the time that our family will be stronger, and is stronger, for the obstacles we have overcome together. I have been told that marriages dissolve over less frustrating circumstances than we have survived. Quite frequently I hear, "I don't think I could have made it through what you have and you seem so fine." This isn't talk about Katrina, but rather about money, career, and sacrifices.

My response to speculations about our financial situation is always the same. I am not my money.

I don't define myself by how much money I have in the bank or how stylish my clothes are. I don't see myself in how impressive my house is or by the model of my car.

This is fortunate, because my bank account is anorexic, my clothes are from the outlet mall, my house is my parents' guest house, and my car is my dad's old Lincoln Town Car, a magnificent shade of Pimp's Suit Emerald Green, right down to the Florida Retiree's Emerald Green leather interior.

But these things are not me, they are just my circumstances. And my circumstances don't begin to scratch my surface.

Despite my circumstances that suggest that my life is a bit in shambles, I am confident. I am confident in who I am and in who I will be. I am confident in my past decisions and my future plans. I have faith and I have hope.

I am a have in this world, but I just so happen to have not.

More than anything else, I hope I am teaching this perspective to my family. We are not our money. We have no reason to be ashamed or embarrassed when I have to pick Pants up in my bright green land yacht of a car. We don't need to hesitate when we have to tell people that we live in my parents' guest house. We are not here because of something we did wrong. We are making the most of the cards we have been dealt and we will be stronger for it. We have been given opportunities that the catastrophe-less around us may never glimpse.

And yet, it sure is easy to make these grand, noble, sweeping statements when I have no temptations before me. I couldn't be a GAP mom right now if I wanted to, let alone if I tried. Sure, I can be a GAP Outlet mom, but that still doesn't include the great car. No, when you are broke, you decide to make the most of what you have. You just deal.

But then what happens when your circumstances change from mental fortitude toward financial strength? The temptations of the GAP mom will rear their ugly heads and what keeps you from folding? What keeps you from succumbing to the power of the Volvo wagon and the day spa?

I fully intend to succumb to the powers of the Volvo wagon and the day spa.

The difference is that when I have money again, when my circumstances change and I can breathe again, I want and plan to remember one thing: I am not my money.

As much as I don't define myself by my circumstances now, I do not want to define myself by my circumstances later, no matter how glossy and glittery.

If I do anything right as a mother, I want to raise children who view the world from the same financial perspective. We are not what we have materially.

The guest post by Nell from meanwhile... reminded me of this objective. While reflecting on how her daughter Matilda has become friends with Taylor, the daughter of a materially-focused, perfection-minded mother, she wrote:

"Matilda and Taylor have become friends. I like to imagine them hanging out when they're older, like when they're fifteen. I imagine Matilda being jealous of how perfect Taylor's family seems, like a TV family. And I imagine Taylor being jealous of Matilda, of how wild and crazy her family is, of how she can make her own choices and be whoever she wants to be. And I know Matilda is getting the better end of that deal."

When Pants and Goose are older, I would love nothing more than for them to be able to seamlessly blend into groups of both the privileged and the struggling. While hanging out with a kid whose home is a trailer, it would be great if that kid wondered, "Which trailer park is Goose's?" While hanging out with a kid whose home is a beach mansion, it would be wonderful if that kid wondered, "Which manse belongs to Pants?"

I had friends like that and I was usually more impressed by the ability of the kid in the mansion to conceal his wealth than by the kid in the trailer. Perhaps this is because I think it is sometimes easier to cope with our circumstances when they are difficult or challenging than to defend ourselves against complacency when our circumstances are auspicious.

If I can raise my boys to define themselves with perspective and to see beyond the material, whether that be an excess or a dearth, I will have done a fine job. If they can recognize what truly matters in this world and that recognition not include a glimpse of the latest fill in the blank trendy toy, then I can exhale.

When it comes to the things that matter, we do "have." We are the greatest of haves in this world full of bitter have nots.

We have tread the waters of the deep sucking divide between the haves and have nots and we have come out on the other side stronger. I'll be damned if we are sucked back to the other shore, as all that we have experienced would have been for naught.

The chat widget I added to my profile has spread like wildfire and all looks good, so I think it's time to make it more readily available. You no longer have to contact me for the code, because here it is for anyone to grab!

A couple of details: This chat program is one which I have paid for (it's nominal, I promise, and my pleasure), not the "official" cre8buzz chat. If you have any questions or problems with it, please just let me know. At any time, should it look like it's not working out, I'll cancel the program and we'll all just pull it from our profiles. So far so good, though, right? A fun stop-gap, at the very least.

I'm still figuring it out, so we might have to change the code later if we spot any improvements.

If anything looks wonky on your profile, tweak whatever you want. As long as you don't change the actual code that links to my account, everything should work great and our chats will be linked.

Let me know if you have any questions. Talk to you soon!
Megan

<p><center><b>Keep browsing cre8buzz profiles<br></br>while you chat by opening<br></br>cre8buzz in a new window.</b></center></p><p><!-- BEGIN CBOX - www.cbox.ws -->
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<iframe frameborder="0" width="200" height="273" src="http://www2.cbox.ws/box/?boxid=1575678&amp;boxtag=2153&amp;sec=main" marginheight="2" marginwidth="2" scrolling="auto" allowtransparency="yes" name="cboxmain" style="border:#DBE2ED 1px solid;" id="cboxmain"></iframe><br/>
<iframe frameborder="0" width="200" height="107" src="http://www2.cbox.ws/box/?boxid=1575678&amp;boxtag=2153&amp;sec=form" marginheight="2" marginwidth="2" scrolling="no" allowtransparency="yes" name="cboxform" style="border:#DBE2ED 1px solid;border-top:0px" id="cboxform"></iframe>
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<!-- END CBOX --></p><center>Visit <a href="http://beta.cre8buzz.com/profiles/89">VelveteenMind</a><br></br> if you would like to add this chat<br></br> code to your cre8buzz profile.</center>

Lead paint. The tasty treat your kids love to eat. Mmm-mmmm.

I am being deluged with Google searches regarding Melissa & Doug wooden toys and their lead paint content. I hear ya, folks. These toy recalls are ridiculous.

Just to follow-up on my previous post "To Do: Stop Poisoning My Kids" (which I thought was hilarious, by the way-- who doesn't love Tommy Boy?), I called Melissa & Doug again today to double check the status of their claims that their toys genuinely are lead-free. Doing it for you because I love you. Well, and because people are starting to link to me about it and I don't want to go to misinformation prison.

According to the Melissa & Doug representative I spoke with today, Melissa & Doug continue to stand behind their testing procedures and assure their customers that their products are lead paint free. No lead paint in their toys.

Lip-smacking good news for you parents of teething toddlers out there.

The rep stated several times that they continue to test their products as they have been for the last 20 years, which is through multiple stages of testing, both in China and once the products arrive back in the United States. Once again, no lead paint.

Lead paint: bad. Melissa & Doug: good. Velveteen Mind: not responsible... therefore, I encourage you to give ole Melissa & Doug a call at their toll free number and pester them with as many questions as you can muster. Try to trip them up. Remind them that you know where they live. Ask them for yourself about that damn lead paint and what the hell is going on in China.

Until then, that's all for my public service announcement for this week. Ooh wait, no, one more thing: I wrote on my Twitter yesterday that I was trying to figure out what my 3 year old having green poop meant. Yep, totally embracing the mommy blogger thing. Well, apparently certain food dyes can do it, particularly blue and purple. On the menu yesterday: blue Go-gurts.

So let's recap:

Lead paint:  bad.
Melissa & Doug:  good.
Velveteen Mind:  not responsible.
Blue Go-gurts:  green poop makers.

Enjoy. Oh, and call Melissa & Doug at 800-284-3948

original post, links, photos at:

http://www.velveteenmind.com/velveteenmind/2007/08/melissa-doug-le.html

At the very least, you can't call me a hovering parent.

While Maguire was out of town the other night, I decided to take the boys up to my parents' house so they could roam free for a little while and we could visit with my brother, Gabe. My brother is younger than I am and very much still a kid at heart, so it was like hanging out with three little crazed Indians. Lots of running around in circles, hooting and hollering, trying to capture each other and wrestle to the ground.

I have to admit, it was a mini-vacation for me, handing over the reigns to my brother for a couple of hours. I just tuned out and played on the computer, watched Joey Fatone on NBC's The Singing Bee (how much fun is that show? totally mindless, but thoroughly entertaining), and snuck a few slices of Maguire's birthday cake here and there. Aaah, this is the life.

There is a slight chance that I tuned out a bit too much, though. In response to the occasional thump!, smack!!, and crash!!! followed by a startled and/or angry cry from one of the younger Indians rolling around on the floor, I found myself repeatedly looking up and saying in a sort of dazed way, "Huh? What just happened? looking to Gabe for a clue: Did you see what happened?"

After maybe the seventh time of saying, "Wha-? What? Is somebody hurt?" the absurdity of the situation struck me and I had to laugh. I turned to Gabe and said, "You must be wondering at this point how my children aren't in perpetual traumatic-injury comas." To which he replied, "And this Seattle reporter called you a parenting blogger, huh?"

Well, he certainly didn't call me a responsible parenting blogger.

When it comes to parenting styles, I would say I fall fairly far outside of the realm of the Helicopter parent, and more in the realm of the Hang Glider parent (yes, I made up that term, but still). I don't so much hover as I do sort of glance around the situation, get the general gist of things, but then continue on whatever path the air current has me going at the time. If need be, I'll swing back around and take a closer look, but if I stop, chances are I won't be able to get started again, so I'm better off letting things work themselves out on their own if I can help it.

Besides, my little Indians are much more likely to notice a noisy Helicopter hovering overhead versus the parenting stealth of my silent Hang Glider. This will pay off later when these little stinkers think they are pulling a fast one on me and then bam! I'm right there on top of them.

And since when did a handful of bumps, bruises, and scrapes do any real harm? It builds character! And at this rate, my kids will be scarred, er, chock full of character.