Miss C: I'm Daisy!

Miss A: I'm Minnie!

Who's mommy?

Miss C: Goofy!

A commercial for a wrinkle cream, one of those miraculous before and after results types, comes on TV.

Miss C: "Mommy you need that!"

I do? Where do I have wrinkles?

Miss C: All over!

Finally, if you're needing a Baptism by fire experience in humbling, just take your 5-year-old daughter with you to try on bathing suits. You'll both end up either laughing or crying (either way, tears will be shed.)

It's official. My boobs have fallen and they can't get up.

I also don't recommend choosing the dressing room next to the 90 pound tan teenage girl because you'll be tempted to crawl under the dividing wall and strangle her when she talks about something not fitting right. I really think effective birth control for teenage girls would be to have them watch moms trying on bathing suits via hidden camera. That would pretty much stave off the desire to have sex or eat for a while.

Stop by my blog this week to enter a giveaway for the super cute online children's boutique, www.LittlePiddles.com!

http://blondemomblog.com/2008/02/01/little-piddles-giveaway-more-cute-stuff-than-you-can-shake-a-stick-at/

If you're in an unusually jovial mood one cold, Friday afternoon after school and you let your 5-year-old daughter select not one, but three, DVDs at your friendly neighborhood Hollywood Video for a five-night rental because the forecast looks glum for the duration, stop yourself and for the love of all that is good and holy do not come home with the first season culmination DVD.

Otherwise, be prepared to have an unexplainable urge to gouge your eyeballs out until this horrific example of animated nightmarishness has been returned to the movie rental place where some other poor unsuspecting parent sucker agrees to pluck it down from the shelf for their child. For all of you high-brow intellectual parents out there who would never rent a My Little Pony DVD, just imagine getting really drunk and then trapped inside one of those scam crane arcade machines that taunt you with the challenge of winning a cheap stuffed animal while listening to circus music full blast. You know if you were only six inches tall. Or something like that.

Ironically the My Little Pony line of toys are among Miss C's favorites and I don't mind the general brigade of pastel ponies at all because coming up with all sorts of Ponyland melodramas occupies her for quite some time. Just don't play the My Little Pony theme song more than once or I might have to hurt you.

The only other animated series that I can think holds a stinky candle to this is the Hello Kitty series. Seriously, one round with either the My Little Pony or Hello Kitty animated idiocy and you'll be kissing Dora's feet. Vive la Dora!

My nominees for surprisingly good animated kid movies of the girly persuasion, besides Disney, (obviously Disney is doing OK without any endorsements from me and we own several classic Disney movies), goes to the Barbie movies. Pixar caliber they are most definitely not, but I'll take Barbie dancing to Swan Lake over annoying pastel flying ponies and horrific plot lines any day. I'm a sucker for classical music and the classic boy meets girl, girl meets boy, girl must overcome scary scumbag witchy woman and flex her girl power muscles story line any day.

Anyone else care to nominate the worst kid DVDs?

Stop by my blog for a cool giveaway from the Canadian mompreneurs that are known as Mabel's Labels.

And did you know I'm having giveaways every Friday through mid-February? You didn't? Well you need to stop by! See you over there.

http://blondemomblog.com/2008/01/25/mabels-labels-giveaway-slap-one-on/

Visit my blog for tips for slackers like me who have yet to buy ONE present. (But hey, the tree is up!)

http://blondemomblog.com/2007/12/05/holidays-without-the-hassle/