Reading Dorky Dad's post about the Alien Hand, and specifically the bit about "Jumping Frenchman From Maine Syndrome" made me think of my wife.

I was telling her about the above mentioned syndrome and she wondered if maybe she had it. I dismissed the notion immediately... but upon second thought, it could be she has a mild form of it.

She has this amazing ability to be startled under the most innocuous circumstances. And when she gets startled, she will jump and/or scream.

I first discovered this fact when we were dating, and I took her to see the movie "Signs". I love creepy movies. I can't get enough of them. I'm not talking about slasher films like "Scream" or "Saw" or any of that. I mean actual horror films, done right.

Okay, so maybe "Signs" isn't a great example of "done right"... but still.

During the film, whenever a startling scene would occur, she'd scream. Not a full-on, lingering wail, but a short blast.

Eventually some girls a couple rows ahead of us got to thinking it was pretty funny, and would laugh every time she'd yelp. She spent the rest of the movie with her face buried in my shoulder.

After we were married and moved into our new house, I found that she'd scream and jump whenever I sneaked up on her. Now, I wasn't doing this intentionally. I don't make a lot of racket when I walk, and she doesn't have the best hearing, so it was easy to do.

For example, she'd be transferring a load of laundry from the washer to the dryer, and I'd come into the laundry room and stand there. Then she'd turn around, see me, and freak out.

Or she'd be coming downstairs just as I am rounding the corner to come up stairs, and she'd shriek upon seeing me.

These startle incidents would usually conclude with her telling me: "I wasn't expecting to see you there!"

"Where were you expecting me to be?" I'd ask in return, genuinely mystified.

After a few years it sort of got on my nerves, the way she'd always freak out every time I happened to startle her.

I could come into the bedroom at night, and she'd scream.

"Hi," I'd say, holding out my hand in greeting. "I'm your husband. I live here too. Nice to meet you."

I've learned since to just make a lot of noise while walking around, to be sure she knows I'm coming.

It doesn't always help though.

Just a few days ago, I was bringing breakfast up while she was showering.

I thought I'd surprise her by bringing her a bite of food while she was still rinsing off.

"Hello!" I said, loudly, as I entered the bathroom. "Breakfast coming!"

"Oh, yummy!" she said back.

Then I opened the shower door.

"AAAAAAA!" she shouted, startled.

"Honey, I just said I was bringing breakfast! You knew I was standing RIGHT THERE!"

"Yeah, but I didn't expect you to open the shower door," she said, sheepishly.

It hasn't gotten better in five years of being together. I guess this is something we're both just going to have to get used to.