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RSS monkee, Social

n case of zombie attack break glass

I woke up this morning with the realization that I was woefully unprepared in the case of a zombie attack. What follows is the 3 step program that I prepared in the event you are attack by the undead horde.

Decapitation-

As we all know the only way to kill a zombie is to sever said zombie’s head. With that in mind I have lowered all of my ceiling fans to neck height.

Misdirection-

I have placed “Free Brains” sighs on all of my neighbors doors. I am not sure if zombies can read but if they can my hope is they will pass me by.

Appeasement-

I have posted a sign on my front door that lists directions to my local Walmart. I say that it is a store full of brains and is called Brainmart. This might seem cruel but lets face facts. Those people are already dead inside.

Feel free to implement this plan if you don’t already have one, unless you are my neighbor.

August 19, 2008 |


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4 Comments so far

  1. avatar
    Bad Momma    , Moms August 20, 2008 6:34 am   

    I’m kind of glad I’m not your neighbor! You scare me. Just a little.. And I don’t scare easily!

    I always have a fresh pot of coffee on in the morning. It helps keep me from turning into a zombie.

    BTW: The ceiling fan thing doesn’t work, we have one in every room and still have our heads. It does leave a nasty bruise, though!

  2. avatar
    Bonnie    , Sales/Marketing August 22, 2008 2:43 pm   

    It has been a few days since this was posted and you have not been active since.

    I hope you are o.k. Bad Momma is right. Ceiling fans don’t work.

    I am also concerned that the Zombies may have misinterpreted your sign & thought you were offering up your brains. Please keep us posted. You’re too new to the Buzz to leave us!

  3. avatar
    monkee    , Social August 22, 2008 7:15 pm   

    Momma, I scare myself!


  4. Half-Past Kissin' Time August 28, 2008 10:41 am   

    You MUST watch this video: http://www.commoncraft.com/zombies :)

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