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Huckdoll,

The Year To Get Hot

Eighteen days from today I’ll be turning 29.

29.

Twenty nine.

The big two nine.

Eighteen days from today, the last year of my twenties will commence.

I’m freaking. Out.

Lets take a year-at-glance look at the decade shall we:

1998 - High school for the first half of the year. Started traveling. Danced on tables in foreign countries after splashing in warm oceans all day. Worked to travel. Life was good. I was supposed to to marry him. My high school sweetheart. His mom was already thinking about our wedding favors.

1999 - Said boyfriend starts experimenting and selling glamorous drugs. This year was falsely shiny and perfect. We were effin’ rock stars with mirrors and curled hundred dollar bills in our pockets. A year of extreme highs and extreme lows filled with anger, rage and denial.

2000 - Broke off the five year relationship while wiping powder white residue from my nose and his, in turn losing everything I had gained being with a connected, tattooed, bad boy. Became a party/club kid, promoting events, venues and parties, dating DJ types and preppies I don’t typically dig. Fell in love with pills, raves and alcohol. Partied till I believe I was dying. Had a chat with a higher power (whose name starts with G) during an assumed overdose and never touched a chemical again. A simple Advil couldn’t be swallowed for years. Panic attacks still try to creep up on me. Big year.

2001 - Met Baby Daddy, fell in lust and moved in with him after two weeks or so. Made out a lot. Did other things a lot. Smoked a lot of pot and cigarettes. This year is a bit of a blur, lol.

2002 - Had my appendix removed. Found a job I loved. Talked Baby Daddy into going to college. Fell behind on rent and short on cash. Moved back to my parents, he moved back to his. Miserable. Found an apartment one block from the beach in the heart of Vancouver with a view of the ocean and mountains. Domestic bliss.

2003 - My company liked me a lot and put me through school. I climbed higher and higher and made more money than I’d ever seen in my life. It was a career. Baby Daddy graduated and was hired immediately. We were BALLIN’!

2004 - A year of living large. A year of expensive wines, restaurants, ordering $200 bottles of bubbly, eating fancy, dressing well, vacationing, skiing, beaching. Then, a very close friend to both of us (the guy who introduced us) died in a car crash and our worlds crumbled. We started looking at life a whole lot different. Perspectives changed. We talked about marriage and babies.

2005 - Went skiing for the New Years Eve holiday. Came back pregnant. With twins. We weren’t trying, just not preventing. Carried them flawlessly to full term. Had them. Big year. Postpartum depression set in. The twins cried, I cried. Big cry fest. Each evening I would drink the frustrations away. I felt totally alone in the world with these two….babies…..who wanted me. I was so frantically busy doing everything, I didn’t even KNOW them. I loved them a lot, but I’m not sure I liked them.

2006 - Continued battling gnarly postpartum depression. Had some hardcore relationship issues. Started smoking to cope. Returned to work full-time in September. I still did not know my own daughters. I ran away to my comfort zone (work) and let my mom take over.

2007 - Became a full-time stay at home mom. Got to know my daughters and liked them! Started a blog. Baby Daddy started working with a major video game developer, major perks and ching-a-ling (though we break even with me not working). Deleted a blog. Started a blog. Joined Facebook. Quit Facebook. Still smoked and drank quite regularly.

2008 - Joined Facebook. Joined cre8Buzz. Quit Facebook. Quit cre8Buzz. Joined cre8Buzz. Big year of social network whoring. Still smoke and drink quite regularly.

So, in eighteen days I turn twenty nine and it’s time for change. I want the last year of this insane decade to be the best. As you can see, I’ve put my body and mind through a lot and it’s been good to me, nonetheless. I’m not quite sure what I’ve done to deserve it, but I think it’s time to give back.

What I will do: On Monday I’m quitting smoking for the fourth (and final) time. I didn’t smoke for three years surrounding my pregnancy - I can do this. It’s time to give my poor lungs a chance. On Monday I’m quitting alcohol. Not forever, just for a few weeks until I stop craving nicotine - and then my consumption will be minimal, like once a week or one glass of good wine a night.

I’m a transfer addict, you see.

It’s time to give my whole BODY a chance. I’ve put it through hell and back and it’s time to start being nice to it. If I don’t, I might wake up with a face full of wrinkles, a clogged artery, cancer, a stroke, liver disease…who knows.

I just don’t want to find out.

So. I’ve basically declared my 29th year: The Year To Get Hot

My vice will be exercise. Running, the gym, the pool - I’m addicted to it all. I love the burn.

By the time I turn 30 *shudder* (sorry), I’m going to look and feel younger than I do now, which will hopefully soothe the burn of…30 *shudder* (sorry).

And I’m finally going to let go of the past ten years and move on - stronger physically and mentally.

Why not ‘The Year To Get Healthy’, you ask?

Because healthy IS hot.

Besides, healthy sounds boring…

I’d fall off the wagon for sure!

May 31, 2008 |

Comments

42 Comments so far

Audubon Ron May 31, 2008 4:41 am
I hated my 20’s, really liked my 30’s, loved my 40’s and 50 really ain’t so bad. Things get sweeter. The health begins to fade. I use to be a specimen. Now, old sh/t is setting in. I was 24 living on the beach and surfing when you were born. Come to recall, I was also selling and doing blow and I seems to remember a drug deal that went bad ending in a high speed motorcycle chase and one guy getting stabbed. How I lived to tell this? Freaky. Let me know when its your birthday so I can wish you happy birthday then.
Bad Momma, Moms May 31, 2008 5:28 am
Wow! That’s a lot of life to live in a decade. Sounds like you have a good plan. I didn’t begin to like myself until I was in my 30s. Your life is about to get so much better! Happy Almost Birthday!
stewartallyn, Dads May 31, 2008 5:33 am
Timelines are an amazing thing. Look at what you’ve accomplished, how you turned your life around, how you’ve grown as a person and a mom…you could do anything you want. Enjoy year 29.
Melisa, Women May 31, 2008 5:45 am
I agree with Bad Momma. The 30’s are where it’s at. I’m hoping that the 40’s are even better. (I’ll let you know in November)

Best of luck to you on your new goals! You’ve got lotsa support out there! (here? whatever.)
Ammey May 31, 2008 6:46 am
Life is definitely better after 29. There is something called a Saturn Return, I know more than one person, me included who it was true for. 29 being a year of an about face in your life. Transformation, rejuvenation and an awakening of sorts. Sounds like it might be a challenge but change is good.
trysh, Crafting May 31, 2008 7:03 am
Oh, yeah! This is YOUR year! I so like your honesty - and no excuses - it’s your life and you own it! Which of course means you get to change it!
I think your plan is very workable - and you are just the one to accomplish every bit of it!
Happy almost birthday, too!
Big Bear Real Estate Agent, Real Estate May 31, 2008 7:26 am
I remember my 20’s / the 80’s. It was a rude awakening. 2 daughters then, two more in the early 30’s. I think they teach me more than I teach them. I admire your plan to improve, it’s not easy. You will feel younger and look younger. Make your addiction life.
MileHiDad, Dads May 31, 2008 7:55 am
Admitting what you just did is the hottest of ‘em all!
Coulda been the whiskey, mighta been the gin/drugs, coulda been the three, four six packs I don’t know… …look at the mess I’m in.
The biggest drug was staring you in the face all along, “these two….babies…..who wanted me”.
Do ‘em right, do yourself right, make ‘em proud of their Hot Mamma!
You go…
-MileHighDad
http://www.milehighdad.com/
Maureen, Painting/Drawing May 31, 2008 9:02 am
Wow, Huck, you’ve done more “living” in nearly 29 years than boring old me in nearly 48.

I wish you luck in the non-smoking quest and the alcohol reduction.

But you’ve always been and always will be Hot.
Half-Past Kissin' Time May 31, 2008 9:05 am
This kind of honesty, self-reflection without judgement, and ambition is what I love about you, Huck. The 30’s are awesome; way better than the 20’s. The jury is still out on my 40’s, but so far, so good! Good luck with the quitting, and instead of saying, “quit for the 4th time,” practice saying, “Quit for good.”
Natalie May 31, 2008 9:21 am
This was going to be MY birthday post (no, I really do have something VERY similar planned - so please don’t think I’m copy catting you when I post it). You cheated and did yours early. Hehehehe.

Seriously though, I will be with you in your quest. I don’t have to quit smoking, but I have other vices that are going to be difficult to give up (*ahem* alcohol *ahem*), so I will be right there cheering you on!

Your experimental phase was at the same time as mine. I’m a late bloomer, but I bet the same songs bring back memories for you as they do for me.
Karen MEG, Moms May 31, 2008 9:38 am
You had a very busy, very eventful 20’s. I think your 30s will be fab.
Healthy IS hot. Actually, for me, turning 30 was a huge downer, but my 30s were both the lowest point of my life so far (no babies) and then the highlights (2 miracle babies). Not so healthy because of all the stuff I was pumping my body with to get preggars. I bet I’m more physically fit now than I was a decade ago.
So now I’m rockin’ the 40’s as much as I can.
Enjoy the next 18 days and 1 year… but just know that it will only be the beginning. I cannot wait to hear more about them.
Maggie's Mind May 31, 2008 10:16 am
I left the longest assed and stalkiest comment ever over on your blog and I’m all confused about do I comment there like I did? Or here like I didn’t? So, here’s this, too. You are fabulous and full of hotness. Go Huck!
abunslife May 31, 2008 11:21 am
I love my 30’s so much more than my 20’s. I’m secure in myself and what I want. I’m finally battling my demons and moving on. I definitely grew up and changed the most in my 20’s and now I’m reaping the benefits of what I learned. Now that I’m in my mid-30’s I’m looking ahead to what my 40’s will bring. That’s the decade the kids leave the house! You go girl, enjoy the last year.
rilah, Women May 31, 2008 11:36 am
all the support in the world, dude.

*We weren’t trying, just not preventing. Carried them flawlessly to full term. Had them. Big year. Postpartum depression set in. The twins cried, I cried. Big cry fest….I felt totally alone in the world with these two….babies…..who wanted me. I was so frantically busy doing everything, I didn’t even KNOW them. I loved them a lot, but I’m not sure I liked them.*

word, totally, just singular.
Piper of Love May 31, 2008 11:41 am
30’s is way better than 20’s!

In your 30’s everything isn’t such guessing game, and I think we have a better understanding of ourselves. At least that’s been my experience.

I wish I could go back to my 20’s and do it with my 30’s brain. But, then again maybe not. I would have missed some AMAZING experiences!

With ages comes wisdom, and I think wisdom is the hottest thing under the sun. I look forward to being a batty old lady with a lifetime of wild stories to tell and remember.

My girlfriends and I celebrated being 29 and a half, it was fun.

30 will look great on you, keep smiling!
crunchycarpets May 31, 2008 4:25 pm
I just can’t get past the fact that I am ten years older than you…. I feel like a grandma.

I too am trying to be more healthy and fit and SEXEEEE

before it all slides down to my ankles
Lunanik, 30 Something May 31, 2008 4:31 pm
Just so ya know, turning 29 was a whole lot more stressful than turning 30. Strange, but true.
Nodragon May 31, 2008 4:46 pm
Huckdoll, it sounds to me like you did a whole lot of living, and that’s what life’s for. The worst bit about life is regretting what you didn’t do. In 11 days I’ll be 61 and still trying to live life to the full. Enjoy every moment - that’s what moments are for. A life without mistakes, without pleasure, without pain is just a series of breaths waiting for death - profound thought for the day.

I’ll bet all your experiences make you a great Mum. With lots more to come. Good luck.
Eve Grey May 31, 2008 5:37 pm
Oh Huck, i love you. We think alike. Don’t worry about the 30 thing, it didn’t bother me at all. I think the 30’s are the hottest time in a girl’s life (looks wise). I’ll quit smoking with you on Monday! (for the 40th time, give or take 10)
Deb (Missives From Suburbia) May 31, 2008 7:13 pm
Trust me when I say in 10 years, someone is going to look at you in the middle of a conversation and say, “You’re how old? What?! I NEVER would have guessed that. I would have pegged you at least five years younger. Maybe seven or eight!” Then you’ll thank your 29-year-old self. (I’m speaking from recent experience here, so listen to me!)

Congrats, and I think hot is a great goal.
manager mom May 31, 2008 8:11 pm
When I look back at my 20’s I am just confuzzled by what a complete ass I was. And now, rounding third base of my 37th year, I still feel like I’m playing at being a grownup.
LaskiGal, 30 Something May 31, 2008 9:47 pm
You can do this. You’re Huckdoll . . . the one and only.

And just so you know, hitting 30 is GREAT. The pressure is off. Kinda like getting that first dent in your new Mercedes . . .

I’m behind ya! Good luck . . .

*I just read all your comments. Seems everyone is all about their 30s!
NukeDad, Dads May 31, 2008 10:13 pm
It’s all a state of mind, Huckdoll. You have a mind that is always questioning, yearning for answers and knowledge. Thing is, you already know tons more than you think you do, and after you hit the mental roadblock that is “30″, you’ll realize that and most of the second guessing will stop. You’ll get more comfortable in your own skin, the girls will be getting bigger, and you’ll have a total blast being their Mom. As they grow they’ll have the advantage of having a Mom who has seen and done all of it; and you’ll have the advantage of being able to answer their hard questions when they come. What more could a child want in a Mom?
jnbammer, Dads May 31, 2008 10:50 pm
Hey Huck! You have a great outlook on what you want to get out of this next year, and it sounds like you are in for a great experience. 29 is a good year/age to figure things out, about yourself and life. I agree with others that your 30s are more about you (yourself and your family), whereas your 20s are harder because they seem to be more about everyone else (friends, boyfriends, partying, freedom, career, all the the stuff you said). Like you, I’ve got a birthday coming soon (next week), but I don’t dread them anymore and I’m sure you won’t either. Enjoy getting “hot(ter)!”
missheathyrmarie May 31, 2008 11:48 pm
you can DO IT bebe :]
i can’t wait to watch the transformation!!
<333
sjoukes, Women June 1, 2008 6:39 am
you are in your prime…you go girl..working out can be addictive…..so they say.. lol
ps you have been 30 a while now.:>))..
RealWorldMom, Moms June 1, 2008 10:36 am
If anyone can pull this off, it’s you, Jen! I’ll be right here, cheering you on!
Soge shirts June 1, 2008 2:41 pm
Dang girl you need to write a screenplay about your life just don’t let diablo cody near it or she will cuten it up even though she probably would use illy.
diana/sunshine June 1, 2008 6:47 pm
great post, huck.
i think you’ll be happier once you healthi.. um, i mean, hotter =)
Nicole, Women June 1, 2008 9:52 pm
Your 30s aren’t so bad. Really

I’m getting to that point, too. Quitting the smoking, reducing the drinking. Getting back to the gym and the pool.
dysfunctional mom June 2, 2008 6:41 am
Best of luck to you! I love knowing that I am free of all addictive stuff, even caffeine. I drink only water! I never though I would say that. It feels great!
TRACI June 2, 2008 8:40 am
Kudos to you!!! Get it shawt;)
Don Mills Diva, Moms June 2, 2008 12:29 pm
You already are HOT!

But I love your determination - good luck!
SherE1, Moms June 2, 2008 1:07 pm
You go girl! Although, if you ask me, you already look HAWT *wink!
lceel June 2, 2008 1:17 pm
You know, I know you’ve heard this old saw a thousand times, but believe ME when I tell you, “You’re only as old as you feel.” I’m 62, chronologically, but in my mind, and inside, I don’t feel any older than the 17 year old that joined the Marine Corps in 1962. Oh, some things have changed, for sure. And some things don’t work as well as they used to. But that’s all ‘outside’ stuff. Inside, that little guy in there that looks out on the world through the eyes of this body, that guy hasn’t aged a bit.
April, Moms June 2, 2008 1:17 pm
Crap. You’re the 2nd person today to tell me they’re going to quit smoking.
I was really afraid of turning 30, but I’m finding my 30s much more enjoyable and rewarding than my 20s.
Vicki Thompson June 2, 2008 2:53 pm
Good luck to you getting hot!! Maybe I should try it before I hit 40………aaaaargh
hamiam, Women June 2, 2008 4:43 pm
I’m not yet a month into 29 and finally starting to feel fine The 20s have been a sucky decade for me and I’m ready to give ‘em up for some Thrillin’ Thirties! This year is the prep work
Hockeyman June 2, 2008 8:32 pm
29 was a great age for me, just 3 years ago. It is a fun year the first six months and the rest just turn into a big countdown. At 30, you generally have a cool ass birthday party and then life goes on and nothing is different than when you were 29 yesterday. The smoking definitely has to go but the casual drinking with occasional blitz is ok in my book. If you drop the cancer sticks this year you will accomplish your goal of being healthy AND hot all at the same time. Nothing is worse than seeing a pretty girl sucking on an ashtray. Good luck and happy early birthday!
LiteralDan, Dads June 3, 2008 2:18 pm
Wow. Just wow.

What a decade.

Here’s to a more even-keeled decade to come, but one not without its own excitement or great stories.
Just Jamie June 3, 2008 5:15 pm
Huck, you’re a rock. Love that.

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