<--Previous post
Next post-->

avatar
RSS extraWHOREdinary, Celebrity Gossip

US Magazine is reporting that Jessica is binge drinking to deal with the pain of seeing John Mayer with Jennifer Aniston. They said she drank for four hours on May 10 and had to call her mom for a ride home. Huh?

Drinking for four hours and calling for a ride home is binge drinking!? Since when!? If that’s the case, I binge drank all day with my grandma, mom and aunt on Mother’s Day. Sheeeet…I binge drink on Leap Year, Thursdays and Rosh Hashanah too! Fill up my shofar with jagermeister I’m tyin’ one on!

I bet Jessica Simpson saw this story and was all “maybe I have a problem! I’m gonna call Daddy and have him put me in rehab!” ‘Cause she’s that co-dependent and that swayed by others opinions. That’s why she’s handling this break up bullsh*t so badly.

She needs to dig her blankey out of storage. I wanted to crawl through the computer and give ‘er a lil’ shaken baby syndrome when I read her Glamour Magazine interview:

He reintroduced me to myself. I thought that I had to be deeper, more profound and more artsy. You change with the guys you date. [I thought] I had to be more intellectual. Come on—just be yourself! Tony taught me that because he loves me [as me]. He made me feel comfortable [being myself] again.

Can someone tell this woman-child that she can love herself without a dude givin’ her the thumbs up??? Sex, yeah, I understand the need… At some point you have say to yourself: “this douche bag treats me like sh*t; I’m out.” Paves! Smack her! And spread some nasty Romo and Mayer rumors like a good gay boyfriend should!

[heh, heh. hi everyone. antman let me on the hill. *rubs hands together fiendishly* my sense of humor is tongue-in-cheek and very perverted BEWARE! loves you!]

May 21, 2008 |


Comments

Name (required)

Email (required)

Website

Speak your mind

11 Comments so far

  1. avatar
    antman    , Antman May 21, 2008 4:57 pm   

    If she is drinkin’ cause of the pain of seeing John Mayer with Aniston, what the heck is Romo doin’? I’m pissed if I’m him. They’ve (Romo and Simpson) been going out for almost 6 months. He gave up a Super Bowl bid for her. I’m re-thinkin’ that commitment if I am him.

    Dang Romo, eveyone knows now . . . for real~


  2. Quirkee James May 21, 2008 5:03 pm   

    Love your post! Glad to have some gossip here on the Anthill. :)

  3. avatar
    Bad Momma    , Moms May 21, 2008 5:35 pm   

    Oh man, I guess he’ll let anyone on the hill. mmm…wait a minute, he let me on here too! You better also beware! Welcome aboard, gossip is good as long as it’s not about anyone on “The Hill” ( not to be confused with The Hills (plural)).

  4. avatar
    extraWHOREdinary    , Celebrity Gossip May 21, 2008 6:43 pm   

    @Bad Momma
    HA! I know you’re talking about the reality show but I thought you were referring to Jessica Simpson’s ummmm…”attributes.” Heh heh heh

  5. avatar
    Bad Momma    , Moms May 21, 2008 7:19 pm   

    You are a sicko! ;] !


  6. piper of love May 21, 2008 9:09 pm   

    What can I say babe, I knew you could pull this off, thanks for posting here. Love your style!

    Poor Jessica. Being hot and stupid is hard. She needs to drink!

    ;)

  7. avatar
    Nessa    , Moms May 21, 2008 9:29 pm   

    I’m just praying she keeps her drinking binges and the rest of her away from any type of Cowboys game for the rest of her charmed lil life. I’d also like to see her grow a brain, realize Christmas songs do NOT require you to sing half naked on a couch and to well…..go away, that’d be good too. She can take Paris with her though sadly, i think even Paris is smarter than BigBoobs Simpson.

    Ohhh and did i mention i don’t particularly care for her???
    Welcome to the Anthill, very new here myself.


  8. Deb (Missives From Suburbia) May 21, 2008 11:43 pm   

    LOL at the “like a good gay boyfriend would”. That’s EXACTLY what your gay boyfriend is for, ladies! He’s letting her down.

  9. avatar
    Melisa    , Women May 22, 2008 5:18 am   

    Awesome post! Love it! (and so true!)


  10. Peg or Meg May 22, 2008 6:51 am   

    OMG! I must be binge drinking on a daily basis! And I’m with ya on the “man to define you” thing. They are good for moving large furniture, though.

  11. avatar
    stewartallyn    , Dads May 22, 2008 7:49 pm   

    “…and Rosh Hashanah too!”

    Oye…that Mogen David Concrod Grape gets me every time.

Top Commentators

Most Popular Posts